Why do things have to be so difficult?

Today was my appointment for my SHG (sonohystergram). This is a procedure where the uterus gets filled with a liquid saline and you have a vaginal ultrasound. They are checking to see how the uterus looks, making sure there are no fibroids or polyps to stand in the way of a embryo implanting.

So I take off work today because I am going to be taking a Valium. I really can't drive while on that, so my mom takes off work to take me. Let me take a step back . . I worked 2-3 days just to find a place in my city that done this test. I had to have made over 30 phones calls. I spoke to several people at this hospital taking about the SHG. I got a quote on the procedure and everything. It was supposed to be all set up. I get to the hospital, go through admitting, pay the balance and everything is good. The nurse takes me back to the procedure room and I just happen to notice the paper says HSG. (HSG is a test that run dye up through your uterus and on into your fallopian tubes.) This is a test I have already had, twice. Once in 2006 and again last August. I told the nurse that I was having a SHG, she said no you are having a HSG. I said WRONG!!! I knew at them point things were going down hill. She said that she needed to go make some phone calls to my RE. After waiting 15 minutes she came back inside and said that my RE said to go ahead with the HSG. If I wanted to change to the SHG I would have to reschedule for next week. My mom and I have already taken off work and I have a Valium in my system!! Plus an HSG is a more painful procedure and I really didn't think it was the right one. I am a calm person, but my calmness flew out the window. I was not happy and made it very clear. I called and spoke to my RE's office to confirm what the nurse said. She told me that for some reason they have the same code for both tests and that is how the "mixup" happened. She told me to go ahead with the HSG that they could get the same results from that. I still question that a little, but I bit the bullet and moved forward with the HSG. As I laid on the cold table, which looks like an autopsy table. They make you move to the end, of course 1/2 naked, you have to hang on by your heals, then move side to side when they ask you too. Can you say uncomfortable! Anyway, as I laid there and everything was going through my mind of everything that I had been through. I had a little break down and cried for a second. It just seems like everything is a struggle. It didn't help that the girl there wanted to talk about her little boy. She said the last time you were here he was one and now he's three. I wanted to say screw you! I don't want to hear about how your child has grown when I am still struggling to have one of my own. It was the wrong thing to say. Just like so many others, she just doesn't get it. Shut the hell up! She deals with people like me on a day to day basis. You would think that she had a clue, but she doesn't.

The HSG was physically painful, even with the Valium. I don't think the Valium worked as good because by this time my blood pressure was skyrocketing! I couldn't really relax. I have to say that this radiologist was much better than the last one. He didn't take nearly as long. The cramps were severe and have lasted all day. I haven't gotten the official results back form my doc, but he told me that everything looked great. That is all I really care about, we just had to go around the world to get there.
I have felt like hell today. He told me that he added extra dye, so I don't know if that is why I am still cramping? Hopefully, all will be better by tomorrow. Anyway that was my crazy day.